My Writing

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My Writing

Post by Aleria the Helping Hand on Tue Nov 11, 2008 8:08 pm

For those of you who don't know. I am an aspiring writer/poet. I have had some of my work published anonomously in non profit magazines etc. Aside from that nothing huge. A few people I have talked to on a more personal level have asked me to share some of my work. So after they twisted my arm behind my back here is one tiny thing I have wrote. I would appreciate if negative comments would be withheld.

United in cause.
Seperated by individuality.
Brought together by chemistry.
And bred with love.
Humanity.


~Leri Bear
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Optimistic.

Post by Guest on Tue Nov 11, 2008 9:06 pm

The poem is nicely written. I like how the structure grows then fades . Its almost like there is an underlying reflection of Life within it. You Grow You Fade You Die..
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Re: My Writing

Post by Dethwalking Terror on Tue Nov 11, 2008 9:12 pm

Very nice aleria , your very talented , i would ask to see more but..i dont feel like bending your arm for it Laughing
im an ok poet , mine are more..."dark" if i can find 1 of mine id share it with you and see what you think
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Re: My Writing

Post by Aleria the Helping Hand on Tue Nov 11, 2008 9:28 pm

Well it isn't any trouble if people want me to write more of what I write in this....just ask.
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Wed Nov 12, 2008 4:31 pm


In a positive way, of course.
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Wed Nov 12, 2008 5:04 pm

Issimus wrote:
In a positive way, of course.

roflmao!! nice!!

but yes you are very talented, and your not keeping it bottled up like most ppl
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Re: My Writing

Post by Dethwalking Terror on Thu Nov 13, 2008 7:54 pm

btw aleria if you could , i would relly like to see more , ONLY if you rlly want to post more
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Re: My Writing

Post by Aleria the Helping Hand on Thu Nov 13, 2008 8:56 pm

Well. If I had been on earlier today I was going to post a new poem I wrote on here. However my teacher was over and found my stash of writing. Needless to say she took the poem I wanted to put on here. When I get it back though I will put it on.

~Leri Bear
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Tue Nov 25, 2008 12:46 pm

i like it, im an ok writer, nothing about poems, but i hav my writing on a website (too long 2 post) but i rlly like ur poem.. i think i found ta address, freewebs.com/livetheifson
ok, so it is ta adress. oh and BTW, its not indented or set n paragraphs >.< (i hate ta internet) Mad
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Wed Nov 26, 2008 5:21 pm

First off: I like your work. You got rhythm down. Though the first thing I noticed wasnt in your work, your preference for no negative feedback. I am an up and coming artist (mainly pastel and stuff) and while I understand that what you make is in essence you (believe, I know. me and my art teacher had some bouts. Razz But shes one of my friends pretty much) negative feedback made my stuff sooo much better. Not to mention, it allowed me to prove my peers wrong on certain aspects like "you ruined this part of the piece" or "This one emphasize correctly". All I can say, is no doubt you're a good writer, just present your works and ask "Hey, whats wrong with this?" rather than "Is this good?"
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Wed Nov 26, 2008 6:36 pm

omg, u draw? u hav got 2 put sum pics up, i hav sum of mine up (sum r 2 big 2 scan ATM) but i hav a Deviantart page
http://livetheif.deviantart.com/
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Wed Nov 26, 2008 7:10 pm

Ill post it when I get home and start scanning them. Some of the pieces are moderately large, and it usually ends up I draw little funny stuff rather than actual stuff.
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Wed Nov 26, 2008 7:14 pm

ah, well, me and my friend, if we COULD scan ta stuff, it would b rlly random, we make soo many things, but its usually drawn on my hands, tats ta prob, ROFLm kinda hard 2 scan a hand....... unless, i hav pics of them on my fone, and i could just send them 2 my email, then post them on deviantart, ya, tat should work, ill try tat wen i get more minutes on my fone Smile (ignore ta rantin, i try not 2 do it)
lol!
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Fri Nov 28, 2008 4:25 pm


















Heres some of my stuff like I promised. Poor quality because of camera phone, and one of the pictures I accidentally deleted when trying to transfer to my sd card.

PS: Moved my post to this thread because THIS is the correct thread. lol
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Sat Nov 29, 2008 12:09 am

lmao, yes this is the right thread
but right thread or not
these are still pretty damn good
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Sat Nov 29, 2008 9:43 pm

ya, i like them, althou, i hav 2 ask, bout how old r u? they sem like they would b done by sum1 30+
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Wed Dec 03, 2008 8:36 am

Im actually 18, about to turn 19. Relatively young, but I know others my age who are better than me by far. Also, last night I was doodling during anthropology class because I was bored as hell. I used Pen as a medium, which is something ive been practicing, but never really touched. It involved alot of hatching, cross hatching, etc etc. Here are the two things. Ones a face (disproportional) and the other is a right arm piece of armor. I was going to do the rest, but screwed up on the breast plate early on and said forget it.

But yeah, age doesn't matter all too much. I mean, the overall quality gets higher with age, but thats because the skill gets honed over the years, and people change how they either view things or draw things by little differences. Such as, starting about a year ago ive been putting a marginal edge on the bottom eye lid of eyes I draw, as well as the top eyelid overlaps the bottom on the outermost edge. Little things like that .Plus, when we get older we can probably shade better. lol, I shade everything incorrectly it seems.
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Wed Dec 03, 2008 7:41 pm

i can chade pretty well, i hav a gift 4 shadin, but sumtimes even i go overboard, (cept n sum cases, were it makes it better Very Happy)
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O.o

Post by Aleria the Helping Hand on Tue Mar 10, 2009 5:37 am

Dear lord I have been gone a very long time....How is everyone doing?

Edit: May as well put some of my poetry up...its longer than previous and yes I copy and pasted them form my saved documents on my computer.

Possession


Once upon a time,
A man committed a terrible crime.
He met a girl who like a star did shine,
And took her away and said, “you're mine.”


He hid her away from all of her friends,
She learned through time that his will gad no bends.
As time passed she lost her shine,
No longer did he say to her, “You're mine.”
Instead he tossed her out like trash,
Which struck a blow that hit her with a bash.


For so long she had heard, “You're mine.”
No longer she heard it, which wasn't fine.
Without that one thing that gave her pride,
She curled up into nothing, shriveled up, and died.


~Ryan


The Pillar


The Pillar was solid no weakness did show.
The Pillar was soft hearted, the people did know.
The Pillar would support you without a doubt.
The Pillar would leave when you gave the shout.
The Pillar was fine with it.
The Pillar was used to being treated like a rubble bit.
The Pillar knew that it was strong.
The Pillar helped correct all wrong.
The Pillar finally found a love.
The Pillar felt betrayed when she gave him the shove.
The Pillar fell over and shattered apart.
The Pillar still remains....fallen with a broken heart.


~Ryan


The Kitten


All was silent in his head,
As if he were lying in his bed.
He remembered her touch and her smell,
Almost as if he wasn't living in this hell.
But then he remembered to his dismay,
That he was sleeping on a pile of hay.
She had left him, thrown him out,
Of this there was no doubt.
For here he slept in this shed,
Using a haystack as a bed.
~creak~
What was that...
The man opened his eyes “Oh its just a cat...”
And as he said there she was,
Though it wasn't just because.
She had felt his sorrow and pain,
Heard his tears through the wood grain.
This little kitten small and cute,
To help the man who was given the boot.
Despite all of his sadness and woe,
The man smiled and let it go.
He picked up the kitten in his arms,
And gave into her cute little charms.
The man stood up together once more,
Scratched the kittens ears, and carried her out the door.

~Ryan~

There is three of my latest pieces....any and all feedback welcome.

Sorry I have been gone so long guys. Life has been moving forward a bit quickly for me.
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Re: My Writing

Post by Joe the Devils Reject on Sat Mar 14, 2009 6:35 am

looks like this alliance is full of talented people. unfortuneately my talent is not on my pc Sad
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Tue Mar 17, 2009 10:01 pm

i luv ta peoms! (i hav been preoccupied 4 a while.........) but yes, i guess ta allaince has talents, which is good.......
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Tue Mar 17, 2009 10:01 pm

soory, my comp was being stupid wen i posted comment, so it duplicated >.<


Last edited by Live Theif on Thu Mar 19, 2009 4:29 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : stupid computers)
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Re: My Writing

Post by Dethwalking Terror on Wed Mar 18, 2009 8:00 pm

Very good poems aleria , you have a nice talent those made me sad >.< keep it up though your art should be noticed alien Coin
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Re: My Writing

Post by Guest on Sat Apr 11, 2009 4:09 pm

everything is very good very nice poem
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Re: My Writing

Post by Joe the Devils Reject on Thu Apr 23, 2009 9:06 am

i need to post some of my stuff but i gott w8 until my course is finished
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